How to Avoid Being a Victim of Expat Limbo Land

This time of year school kids can be heard talking about who’s staying and who’s going, the annual summer turnover of international kids. These are the lucky ones, the ones whose parents organisations have relatively efficient succession planning.

Then there are the other expat partners, you can spot them easily, the ones with the worried pinched faces, the ones who dread the question; “and so have you heard yet?” Why? Because the million dollar question is still unanswered, “where in the world will it be?

These are the unfortunates of expat land, the ones who find themselves now residing in “limbo land”.

And believe me this is not where you want to be.

These are the people whose organisations are still searching, hunting for the “right” vacancy, or worse still evading and avoiding all together. There is an upside, well kind off, at least the dreaded “R” word has not yet been mentioned; redundancy or repatriation, there is perhaps still hope.

The bad news is, no one is giving them a clue as to where they are going next. Of course their hopes have been raised several times during the year, interesting hushed telephone conversations, cryptic emails, promising starts followed by the cold echo of silence.

And as the weeks and months wear on, the pressure begins to grow. The employee feels abandoned and more and more concerned for their future. Desperate to put on a bright front for “the expat partner and family” they talk the situation up “of course the company will look after us”. The expat partner wants to believe, really they do, but more and more they are waking in the middle of the night, wondering, are we about to come unstuck, or worst still be sent to some impossible location and most emotively, most sickingly worryingly, what about the children. What if the schools are no good, what if the schools are full, it is getting late in the day for applications. What then….

Barbara Schaetti calls this state of being “liminality”

“when a person is in liminal space, he or she in on the threshold, no longer part of the past and not yet part of the new beginning”.

(Thanks Culturalingua for that quote)

And worst still they have no idea what the new beginning will be.

Every time I watch people being put through hell by the same organization that promised so much at the outset, I wonder at their loyalty. And quite frankly I want to go and bash a few heads together at HQ. Part of the most valued asset of any organization, its human resource, is being herded like cattle, when they should be being nurtured and supported through a period of difficult transition.

So what can you do to avoid limbo land?

1      Be clear about what you do want. In preparation for the moment the options do finally arrive, spend time now deciding what you want. What are your criteria for a new location? Will you really go anywhere or are there limits? It’s OK to have limits, as long as you’re honest and acknowledge them in time for something to be done about them.

DECIDE what is non-negotiable, be absolutely clear and upfront about that and ensure that you and your partner agree.

2      Always have a back-stop, back-up plan? In our Decide and Prepare programmes we talk about the importance of having a back-stop. Personally we decided to keep our home in the UK, our back-stop, if everything failed we could choose to return there. Ensure that you have some money set aside ready to see you through the first few months back home job searching should you need to return at short notice. If you have children, know the local schools and the system for getting children in so that should you have to you can get into action straight away.

3      Be as proactive as you can in leading the company to the solution you want. If the employee knows what they want and are clear with the organisation about what that is then it helps them to “place” them. It will focus their mind on opportunities rather than seeing the employee as the problem that needs to be resolved. The name of the game is the long game, start networking and building the connections you need to assure your future in your organization at the START of your assignment, not in a panic at the end.

4      Quite simply, move on: If all else fails and the organization is not taking your future seriously then consider whether this is the organization for you? We hear expats say that they have no choice, how can they say no? Remember there is a big wide world out there. There are other opportunities and better places to be. Don’t let yourself be the victim …